To be held like that was so strange to him, he hadn't meant to draw attention and he didn't want pity but it didn't even feel like that. It felt like Sirius was concerned, like he cared and wanted him to feel better. It was the oddest thing. Remus nodded slowly, a little lost for forwards, walking into the apartment and looked around with interest.
He sat on the couch and then looked at Sirius, nodding. "Beer works, thanks."
What did he even say to someone who cared this much, who seemed to be some weird fantasy he imagined and not even a person. He let his head lie back against the couch and looked at the pride flag. "I'm sorry." He didn't even know why he said that, he just felt like he owed it to Sirius. Sirius was loving and fun and playful, he was full of life. And Remus wasn't. It seemed unfair to steal his time.
"What are you sorry for? You spill something?" Wait, he didn't even have anything yet. Sirius walked over with two beer bottles, opening them against the table and then handing one to Remus. He looked at him as he sipped from his own beer, frowning a little. "Look, I get it. A lot of life is about being made to feel as if you've got to apologise for existing. I know I got that plenty from my family. Can't even imagine how much worse it must be for you."
With the many boxes Remus ticked. Sirius shook his head a little. "But this is you. This is me. All we are doing is hanging out. Living life. I want you to live life unapologetically, yeah? With me."
"You're right. It just -- I think I didn't sleep on the train. I think I died and this is like the hallucination I see during my death cause word for word, it's a lot like fantasies I've had before. A nice guy, really handsome, who doesn't care about any of the many things that get me rejected on a daily basis. Just doesn't feel real." He sipped his drink and wondered, curiously, what chance they stood if this was all real. Live fast, die young and leave others behind didn't seem so fun.
"You're the best thing to happen to me in ... about six months. Maybe more. You beat out the chocolate cake I got for my birthday." Only just.
"If that's what it feels like, then you really ought to make the most of it, don't you think?" Sirius raised an eyebrow and dropped his voice playfully. "I'm your fantasy, baby. Come and live it."
He took another sip of his beer before putting it aside, so he could put a hand at the back of Remus's neck. "We'll take it slow. Some snogging and cuddling and tomorrow I'll pinch you. We'll make sure you are awake and alive. And then I'll show you what life can be like."
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He sat on the couch and then looked at Sirius, nodding. "Beer works, thanks."
What did he even say to someone who cared this much, who seemed to be some weird fantasy he imagined and not even a person. He let his head lie back against the couch and looked at the pride flag. "I'm sorry." He didn't even know why he said that, he just felt like he owed it to Sirius. Sirius was loving and fun and playful, he was full of life. And Remus wasn't. It seemed unfair to steal his time.
no subject
With the many boxes Remus ticked. Sirius shook his head a little. "But this is you. This is me. All we are doing is hanging out. Living life. I want you to live life unapologetically, yeah? With me."
no subject
"You're the best thing to happen to me in ... about six months. Maybe more. You beat out the chocolate cake I got for my birthday." Only just.
no subject
He took another sip of his beer before putting it aside, so he could put a hand at the back of Remus's neck. "We'll take it slow. Some snogging and cuddling and tomorrow I'll pinch you. We'll make sure you are awake and alive. And then I'll show you what life can be like."