"I doubt you are thick at all, Harry. Just sounds like you went to a shite school, innit?" Sirius frowned, eating another piece of pizza. "I don't know how I'll sent you to school yet, can't exactly let myself be seen there... But I can teach you, yeah? I can teach you about magic and stuff."

He nodded his head, trying to convince himself. "I was always good in school, I bet I could teach you just fine. We'll make it fun." That should work. "And then no one can bully you either."